For Shame

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Coarse, white sands
Swallowed occasionally by salty, crystal waters
Sky the lightening apricot of the pensive sunset
 
Ravishing prints like those of a migrating turtle
Left in the ground by the chocolate strands of my mother’s hair
The delicate curve of her skull
The scant taper of her arms
The massive arch of her buttocks
The inch-deep footsteps of her children alongside her defunct body
As they drag her closer and closer to the shore
 
My father is staring at me
Making me loathe my transient amnesia
More and more each second
 
Sky’s getting darker
Seagulls seem daft
Their screaming fills my ears
Like the apprehensive wail of my mother
When I watched her scarlet blood dash from the knife wound
Race across my arms and into the fabric of her white, silk blouse
 
In the heart
 
Ground’s getting cooler
Shore seems
A thousand miles away
The look into my father’s eyes when I slit his throat
Blood rained down skin like tears of one who’s lost their only love
 
I felt chills of judgment
Not looking at me, but my soul
 
Let the water engulf the naked forms
Relief at last
Father was so heavy
 
Little sister runs out
Toes splashing against the foam of the tide
And with her four-year-old fingers
Closes her father’s eyes at last
 
Does he see our faces? Does he see Satan?
 
Does he see white galaxies
Spaced apart on a canvas of midnight
Drifting closer and closer to the never-lasting sun?
 
Death says it’s nice to see him again
 
Mother’s gone peacefully back to the place from whence she came
She’s with the one she loved all her life
Watching my father’s every move over her shoulder
 
Sipping jade juice
Smoking a cigarette made of fallen angel wings
With eyes closed—oblivious
 
Holding a flaming Venus rapaciously in her palm
 

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