Split My Brains

Bradley Hislop's picture


Do you remember " let's talk" ???
perhaps I was seated on the toilet ranting
I think I was trying to say something...
I wanted to ask you if it is real...
You were laughing... it was funny... no sense was made
Maybe I wanted to say this:
Do I really love? 
Why do you want me?
Do you want me?
How do you want me?
Am I just a FUCK?
Take that object off your finger
My brain reacts to it negatively
Do you believe in it?
Is it real?
I hate that fucking thing...
Remember nothing of this has ever been stated.
I couldn't.
I am a coward sometimes.
I don't want to be... believe me.
I have pride
poke and poke and poke...
until the balloon sweats
droplets of fear and lust and pain streak my face
I struggle to emote... like always
pull it out of myself... it should be easy.. but it's not
If you leave where will I fit? 
If I fit when will you leave?
Will we embrace with reality?
I wish this was a story, one with twists and turns and upheavals
it's a walked path I think
footprints ahead of me reveal mistaken routes
or do they?
I know the route to your center, to your twitching writhing secretions
the sounds of you and I connecting...
perhaps I am a fool... I think I am
I constantly prove it to myself
nonetheless I am lost...
My brains split in two
to, two, too...

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thanks for reminding me that feeling... great

I never knew.

I never knew.


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